Friday, September 05, 2008

Finally sleeping (and waking!) in my own bed

There is nothing more cosy than being at home when it is dark and wet outside! We are finally home!!! We came home on Wednesday. It is lovely to be back with the girls. William is OK bit not his usual self. He was better at the start of the week so we fear he has peaked. We are enjoying every minute at home in case it doesn't last but we are hopeful we will be here for a few weeks at least! William is having antibiotics 'locked' in his line when we stop the TPN at the moment so, hopefully, if he is feeling a bit yukky from the bugs building up in his gut again now his antibiotic treatment is finished, his line should stay clear for a while.

I made a list of all the things I miss in hospital. The girls were top of course and next came; freedom away from asking permission to leave a locked ward, singing out loud, playing loud music, my bed and all my 'stuff'. I have been enjoying all of that over the last couple of days. It does feel a bit strange going about normal things like school runs and shopping with the phone safely in my pocket, knowing we could be called at any time. We are getting on with things but hoping to get that call soon as we can see that William seems to pick up less and less after these infections. He is fine but he seems to stay a little more lethargic and pale each time. It does seem harder for him to beat the bugs too as we are in hospital longer each time.

I am getting used to the transplant now and 'white nights' are less of a problem at home. However, a new problem for me seems to be waking several times in the early hours. I think it is similar to how you sleep lightly and wake a lot when you know you have to get up really early. Subconsciously, your mind stops you from sleeping too deeply so you hear the alarm. I think my mind is stopping me sleep too deeply to make sure I hear the phone should it ring. In hospital, I knew a nurse would come and shake me if necessary. I'm sure it will pass and, anyway, we were assured we would be roused if we had the call. I think they send the police round if all else fails! With my moblie and home phone on my bedside table, I'm sure that wouldn't be necessary!

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